The Five Love Languages

My primary love language is probably
Quality Time
with a secondary love language being
Physical Touch.

Complete set of results

Quality Time:		9
Physical Touch:		8
Words of Affirmation:		5
Acts of Service:		4
Receiving Gifts:		4

Information

Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.

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Poetic reflection


Some of my thoughts written during my stay in NZ...


"Beyond the surreal skies of white and blue
The fir trees and the lush greenery
Life beckons to me its promises.
Intangible. Yet hopeful."


"Nostalgia. A deep-setting emotion, rises with each heave of the chest
Unclear memories, but a poetic, melancholic sense of longing.
Life, a journey of experiences.
Sights, sounds, recognized, remembered throughout years"


"Fingers moving gracefully from side to side
Pressing down bars of ivory
A familiar tone, a revisitment of a long forgotten memory
Through a string of melody.
I remember things that I use to see, feel and touch.
How ironic, we forget the details of the experiences we had
With each passing year, we forget...more and more."


Cest'La vie.

Movie Review: Yours, Mine, Ours.

You see, Frank Beardsley (Dennis Quaid), an admiral in the Coast Guard and a widower, runs a tight ship. His eight children, ranging in age from 4-ish to 17-ish, exhibit personalities much like his, the ones in high school being cheerleaders and student body presidents. Everyone gets good grades. The youngest kids call their father "admiral." There is not a rebel in the bunch.

Having just relocated the family to his hometown of New London, Conn., Frank runs into his high school sweetheart Helen North (Rene Russo), a daft designer of handbags who is also recently widowed. She has 10 kids (four "hers" and six adopted), and their house is a chaotic melting pot. Like the Beardsleys, the Norths have taken on their parent's personality as their own -- musicians, artists, poets, and so forth. They're the kind of people who spray-paint a rosebush and call it art.

They are soon married and the two clans move into an old lighthouse, the only building in New London that can hold them all (short of a hotel, I guess). While the parents are in post-honeymoon bliss, oblivious to the powder keg they've created, the two groups of children hate each other. ("Mom gets married, we get drafted," says one of the North children of the Admiral's strict way of governing his affairs.)

But there is a brief truce in the war of preppies vs. hippies, long enough for the factions to join forces. In a sort of reverse "Parent Trap," the children plot to break their parents up so that the families can go back to their separate lives. Frank and Helen have thus far let their love blind them to their differences. The kids' plan is to force them to notice how opposite they are.

It was really interesting as you see the children bonding with one another as they go about with the plan of creating conflicts and messes...I especially loved the way the BLUE and RED spate battle out. It was really interesting and fun to see the contrast between the 2.

Films that promote a traditional two-parent, multi-kid family as sweetly and proudly as this one does are rare enough that, if you espouse those values yourself, it's worth seeing the movie just to support the idea of it, even if it's not exactly a brilliant piece of work. Well, here's a movie that embraces that segment of society -- the old-fashioned, no-sex-before-marriage, let's-raise-a-big-family types -- without mocking them or even suggesting any alternatives.

For myself, I'm interested in movies that are good, regardless of whether I agree with their social views. But if that kind of thing matters to you, and if you view your movie-going choices as a way of making a statement, then here's one of those films you've been asking for: clean and pro-family.

Topic to ponder

Are you in for the EGO or Spirit?

Let's begin by specifically examining these 2 different aspects.

Our EGO looks at the hot company the guy runs or his stock options that just vested or his flashy car or nice muscles. Our EGO looks at her great body and how all the other guys say how hot she is. But our SPIRIT looks for something else.


Our SPIRIT (higher-self) often doesn't pick the person we fall in love with. Although we frequently see people fall in love at first sight in a movie or on television, the actual reality of those relationships being the ones that last are pretty rare.


How can you tell a Soul mate from an Ego mate?

1. Do you show each other equal levels of respect? If either of you are putting the other on an unrealistic level it is likely that the relationship may eventually topple from its foundation. Also, with unequal respect, love will not be balanced, either.

2. Do you have similar or at least compatible goals? Compatible dreams, vision, and goals are the most important things to look for in relationships, because they are the root of issues that could eventually derail the relationship train if they are incompatible.

3. Are you comfortable with each other? In a book I read a few years ago called Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay, by Mira Kirshenbaum, many of the questions the author asks about a suspect relationship are questions about whether you like the other person's looks, smell, taste, etc. The idea being that if your partner grosses you out you're headed for trouble. This is also a bit of an Ego play, though, so I think it is important to pay attention to where those feelings are coming from.

4. Are your spiritual beliefs compatible? How do you answer spiritual questions? Do you believe in God? What is God to you? Do you believe in prayer? How often? What do you think of Heaven or Hell or other spiritual concepts of eternity? Do you believe we have freedom of choice or is our life pre-determined? To what extent? How do you feel about spirits or angels? These are all questions that can help you determine your spiritual beliefs. Notice: I did not say RELIGIOUS beliefs. Many people make a happy couple even though they have two separate religions. Yes, this may present challenges when you decide which religion to raise children in (many decide both, letting the child decide), but religion is not a true barometer of relationship success or failure. Spiritual beliefs, on the other hand, are highly important.

5. Are you infatuated or do you have your feet on the ground with your lover? If you think they are practically perfect you may be overlooking things due to feelings of infatuation. The biggest challenge I encounter is that when I am infatuated, I am often blind to that type of logic and won't hear anything of it. Sometimes infatuation has to run its course as we need to learn certain lessons. However, if we can avoid the lesson and save both people in the relationship from getting a broken heart, then all the better, right?

6. Do people you know think you're a good couple? Ok, sounds stupid, but I've seen people whose potential mother-in-law couldn't stand them (or even speak to them). Does that sound like a supportive environment? Our support system needs to be supportive of a relationship. That is why we have our support people (family, friends) attend weddings in the first place: to be witnesses and agree to support the marriage in good times and not-so-good times.

7. Do you feel safe, empowered, and valued by your partner? If you cannot fairly answer "yes" to being safe, empowered and valued, you're likely missing a key element.

8. If your lover has lots of side Ego-perks, such as a kick-butt job, a hot car, high-brow social status, or a model's body, how would you feel if the particular "perk" went away? If they gained weight or a skin disorder of some form, would it matter? Would you still love your partner?

9. How do you get along with their friends? Again, this is a support system issue. If you think their friends are pigs, jerks, sleazes, or users, it is highly unlikely you're going to fit into their scene.

10.Does your partner assume responsibility for previous relationship failures (learning experiences)? If they don't, they're going to learn again with you. Blame and resentment are not fun to hold onto. If one or both partners has not yet learned to forgive past grievances (see Letting Go Of The Past, Forgiveness, and Surrender) they may create some new grievances with you. If you hear blame and resentment in descriptions of past loves, you're highly likely headed for pain in your new relationship.

11. What does your internal spirit guide, your higher self, say about the match? When you get quiet and meditate about them, how do you feel?

12. Last, is the timing right? If they're in a relationship now, this may not be the best timing. Have they healed from past relationships? Are they able to love their own self, first? These things are important to resolve PRIOR to getting into a new relationship, otherwise, you may be resolving them together, which can be quite a bit more difficult than on our own. Timing is key to when we meet, in terms of developing all the other characteristics we've discussed.

Here you go.

Heard of ProJect PinK?


"If you are a female/lady/woman/girl blogger, all you have to do is submit your best, sauciest, scandalous, sexiest, juciest, most tear-jerking, most emotional, most unbelievable blog entries to projectpink@mail.com. Elvina would need about 150-200 entries, so do spread this news around to any female blogger friend of yours.

The success of this project depends on the quality of the submissions. Here's a mini-guide on what proJect pinK is looking for.

What's Sizzling:
- eye-openers
- heartstrings tugger
- real life accounts
- love, lies and lingerie
- confessions
- secrets
- men
- unique stories
- dating
- struggles
- death
- autobiographies
-.....and other irresistible content.

What's Fizzling
- days of your lives (yawn..)
- run-of-the-mill stories (real or otherwise)
- copyrighted materials
- slanderous and libelous topics
- movies/music reviews
- unoriginal materials
- ...and any other sleep-inducing topics

What's the criteria? Initially I had a list of 1,698 terms and conditions, but then I realized I couldn't remember all of them so I decided to trash them all away.

Criteria for submissions
- 2,500-5,000 words per entry
- multiple submissions are ok
- submissions from other countries are welcome (as long as they can prove their gender)
- check for grammar and spelling mistakes
- use font Arial, size 12: double spacing
- give an attention-grabbing title to your entry
- illustrations submitted must be original (or the copyright owners will sue the pants off ya)
- save your entries in a word document, together with a cover page including these details:
(1) real name + blog name (if any)
(2) age
(3) your blog's URL
(4) contact number
(5) email address

and finally

(6) a short paragraph of about 600 words on what you think about MEN

This shall be a mini-prologue that leads to your entry.


"It's is a little project that aims to bring together the women of the blogosphere - and compile some of their favourite entries. It's a mini dream to showcase the female bloggers who are bold enough to share their lives and stories so openly to the entire world.

Now if blogging is never an issue - where there is absolute zero control on the internet, why would putting some stories that you have wrote before on a book be so daunting?

Even if your stories are not saucy or juicy or mind-blowing, it's really not important. It is who you are that is significant to the project. I want to read the heartfelt stories you blog about. I want to share the joys you experience in some of your memories. I want to encapsulate your thoughts when you are feeling lousy.

If it's good enough to be shared online, it will definitely make it into this book. I want real women, with real stories to tell, who sometimes may live out another life through a URL.

For every girl who knows about proJect pinK but shys away from it, for whatever reasons, I am one step nearer to aborting this dream. To be honest, I am already quite disheartened by the many "Oh it's a great project but I don't think my stories are good enough so I will not participate" comments. I have always thought if a group of like-minded people form an allegiance to pursue a common goal, nothing is impossible. Especially more so if it's made up of confident, sincere and real women like the many who have been reading this blog."

-Elvina


People out there, spread the world, and gals, start sending in you entries now.

Went for a musical at City Hall on sunday evening to support my bro, who was performing for the first time. Attended the event together with Vince's mom, Thomas, Ashley and Wenzheng.

There were 2 different musicals that were staged:

Peter and Pierre

Two performers commence on a selection of songs, which they sing according to their thoughts and emotions. Tension soon builds between young and cocky Peter and veteran, worldly Pierre, as they confront each other across the generation gap. Peter tells his story of his childhood, youth and early betrayal of love. Pierre takes over and shares his experience of love, humility and letting go. Eventually youth and age are reconciled.

Roses and hello

A law firm tries to buy out a neighbouring floral shop. Penny, the shop's owner, finds herself facing some of the most difficult choices of her life, whilst Chris, the sin of the law firm's boss, learns about finding courage in the face of change. These and other memorable characters find and lose their way and direction in a story with romance, humor as well as a deep message to describe the intricacy of relationships.

Each musical was around 45min or so, and I enjoyed myself. It was interesting that they made use of symbolism and subtlety in the enactment of the various scenes in the musical. There was so much passion in the acting, kudos to the solid and excellent cast, song composer and music coordinator, as well as the screenwriter who made the various transitions in the musical seamless. I especially loved the music in "Roses and Hello" as it was being performed live by Esther Yang, an excellent pianist and composer. My bro acted and sang really well. I really proud of him! His mom was beaming from ear to ear and I could see that she is really proud of her son. Great work bro.

I look foward to have more opportunities to attend more musical dramas, as I really liked the stage-acting of musicals.

For those that are interested in musical/drama acting:

http://www.thenextstageacademy.com/programmes.htm

And I saw Rosalind Pho too...as part of the audience. The picture below is just one of the early random pics of her, when she was still involved in Channel 5.

A walk through memory lane : Part I

Was packing and clearing some of my stuff when I chanced upon a script for a secondary school skit that was written a long while ago.

" The story is between two friends because of money. One of them is call TOM and the other one call JACK. The thing is Jack rent money from Tom for along time but still haven't return yet. By this moment Tom need this money to do for his mother operation. But he doesn't want to return.

Now Tom knows his charter than he feels very sad and hates him very much. He is thinking how to make Jack to return money to him. must do something on it than he will get back the money(thinking) that friend out his name Myubo kumar and tell him the story about, what happen ask him to help up make Jack to returning the money so Myubo Kumar teach Tom one of the curse about voo doo.

The next day on the P.E lesson Tom pretend not feeling well so he tell teacher Mr. Ho to stay inside the classroom. So on the other side Jack is attending P.E lesson as usual. Just when everyone go for P.E lesson leavening, Tom stay inside the classroom alone so have a chance to use the voo doo(curse) with a small paper pasted on the voo doo with name Jack written on it. Tom start to curse and pok on the voo doo and the same time Jack can feel the pain on his body what pok by something than he ask for go back to classroom and happen to saw. Tom was doing something strange at one coiner of the classroom. Jack dashes in and took the voo doo from Tom happen to see his name(Jack) on the voo doo, so Jack question him what are you doing with his name on the doll.

But Tom keep in silent and try to walk away of classroom than suddenly Jack garb his hand and say this is the curse of western country. Jack report to the teacher about this, teacher question Tom why are you doing that, so Tom explain to the teacher Jack never return money to him. The teacher suggest Jack return the money imediately.

After a few day Jack return the money to Tom from that day onward their friendship had come to the end."

Wow. That was a whole deal of emotive writing.


Next, I came across this crumpled paper which wrote something like this, probably written during my secondary school days:

10 surefire ways to win your gal

1. Be sincere and truthful <--- (Cheating! 2 points mentioned here)
2. Be devoted
3. Be considerate
4. Be caring
5. Be serious (I do not knw if this equates to being devoted or just graveyard serious)
6. Be patient
7. Be understanding
8. Be romantic
9. Be self-confident
10 Be yourself

Wow. The psyche of a secondary student.

I also came across some older neoprints that I've taken in the past..

Movie stubs from the movies I've watched from 1998 to around 2004.

As well as some pager codes. LOL.

584 512 1314- 5843232342

5121313-3344-08

5127453942 51426

I hardly remember how these codes work. Well, back in those days where love declarations are being conveyed through codes like these.

Those were the days.